(Published in readingroomco.com )
The year was
2043. Lakshmi and Ayyappadas had decided to get married. They have been
friends for more than three years and now both of them felt mature enough to
enter the risky phase of life, so to say! Now it is the turn of their parents
to meet and Lakshmi's father being wheelchair bound, Ayyappadas' parents
decided to visit Lakshmi's house instead of asking Lakshmi and her
parents to visit them.
Both the
families were in high spirits. Their children's wish is going to get fulfilled.
So this is the time for the families to rejoice. Seeing a smiling Lakshmi at
the door, Ayyappadas' mother held her would be daughter close and
kissed lovingly on her forehead. After the initial chit chat, the would be
bride and groom set off to roam around in the yard while their parents tried to
get to know each other. Ayyappadas' parents, though Tamilians, spoke good
Malayalam. Both of them were central government servants and thus they had the
opportunity to live in Kerala for a long time.
By the
time both of them joined their parents, Lakshmi's mother, a bit panicked,
was running hither and thither to the kitchen and living room
in a hurry. Ayyappadas' mother lovingly grabbed her hands and made her sit near
her. They all started exchanging pleasantries. Since the boy and girl
themselves had also decided on the modus operandi of the great event, there was
not much left for the parents to do. The children were firm about a simple
marriage ceremony avoiding all pomp and show to which their parents also
pleasantly agreed . In fact, the parents were left with no choice other than to
simply agree! So now the parents are left absolutely free to indulge in
their own sweet world!
They were
relaxing after lunch, when Ayyappadas' mother chose to narrate a story.
"Even
though we people are from Tamil Nadu, we are fond of you Malayalees. It
was your Sabarimala Ayyappan who gave us our one and only son, know?' Lakshmi's
father and mother looked at each other in amazement.
"We had
no children for a few years, it was then that someone in the
neighbourhood suggested worshiping Sabarimala Ayyappan. They had cited the
example of your famous singer of yester years too. That bhajan proved
beneficial, we believe, and that is why we called him Ayyappadas.
Whenever we call him, we will remember the great lord Ayyappan.' Ayyappadas'
father said. Lakshmi's parents' faces lit up.
"My
father is also an ardent Ayyappa devotee auntie," said Lakshmi with
a hearty laugh. "Even though Ayyappadas and I am nit that religious,
we had visited Sabarimala last year. It was very convenient since we could
straightaway alight at Erumeli Airport. Instead of choosing a taxi up to the
temple, we walked up the hill after crossing Pampa and had good fun too."
"Oh,
really? Good. Lord Ayyappan doesn't care if one has devotion or not, dear. He
welcomes all those who come to meet him." Then there was a silent
pause. Ayyappadas' mother looked lost in thoughts and appeared a bit sad too.
"I had
served him his first morsel of rice there, keeping him on my lap. It was my
word to Ayyappa Swamy. Then I went there with him for three years in a row and
prayed. That too was my vow, to bring him to Ayyappa's abode until he is five.
But ...' Everyone looked at her with great curiosity.
"When
we went there in 2018 for the 4th consecutive year, the protesters
stopped me, or rather, they chased me as if I had done something formidable.
Luckily, the boy was being carried by his father. A large group of men
holding stones, blocks and sticks chased me and almost dashed upon
me. Somehow or other, I just had a narrow escape, thanks to a police officer. I
had to break my vow, and I could visit my favourite deity at his abode
only after 10 years." Her face turned pale in those old horrid
memories.
"Lakshmi
dear, could you please bring me a cup of water?" she requested.
Lakshmi
noticed her father only when she was coming with water from the kitchen. She
noted that her father's face has turned pale and she moved to her father. But
her father ignored her and told Ayyappadas' mother,
" Isn't
Manithi your real name? A span of 25 years has not brought about much changes
to you, it seems. But how about me?" Manithi was shocked to hear that, so do
others who were present there.
"Oh my
God! So you know Auntie beforehand?" Lakshmi asked her dad in amazement.
" Yes,
I do know her. I was the leader of that gang of protesters
who were pelting stones at the ladies who came for darshan. " Then
he hid his face in his palms and began to sob silently. Lakshmi stood shocked. Ayyappadas
quietly went out of the room. After a
moment of uncomfortable silence, Manithi and Bhaskar left their seats and moved
towards Laksmi's father.
"It 's
ok bro, please leave it. I narrated those horrid events just casually, and was
not at all aware of your role. It had happened 25 years ago. We will simply
leave it. Let us not relive that anymore."
"Ayyappa
Swamy must have punished me for my wrong doing on that day, for attacking
unarmed women," he said sobbing, looking down at his paralysed legs.
"Hey,
please don't say thus bro,' Manithi tried to console him. "Ayyappa Swamy
is not a God who retaliates thus. Isn't he the God who announces 'I am thou
thyself'. Even otherwise, how could Gods take revenge on us, helpless
human beings? Aren't they the ones who are supposed to help us?"
Laksmi's dad
folded his hands together towards Manithi as a gesture of respect and
gratitude. "You are really kind hearted. That is why you could forgive me
that easily."
"Shall
we make a move now, we have to go a long way," Ayyappadas reminded
his parents, may be in a bid to ease the situation.
"True,
but we should meet again, all of you please pay a visit to our house too."
Bhaskar did not forget to invite them cordially.
Immediately
after they left, Lakshmi went to her room and closed the door. Even her mother
couldn't assess if it was sadness, shame or anger that was reflected on her
face.
"I
myself have spoilt my daughter's wish, oh my Ayyappa Swamy!" Her dad
lamented in anguish. His wife pushed his wheelchair to their bedroom. After
settling him in their bed, she came out and sat in the living room empty
minded. They have only one daughter...one and only daughter...but
still...
Three long
hours passed before Lakshmi presented herself before her parents. Her
face looked calm. Her father and mother were sitting there in silence. The room
was not even lit up. Seeing Lakshmi, her dad sobbed and said: "Oh my
dear daughter ! I have spoilt your dreams... "
"Oh,
what do you think, Acha? Do you think that they have dropped the marriage
proposal because of this? Do you also think likewise Amma?" Asking thus,
she burst out into laughter and continued, "Such things were typical of
your generation, Acha - caste, religion, family name, wealth, horoscope
matching... and what not! Luckily, our generation is not like that. It was we
who loved each other and decided to get married too. Marriage is not something
thrust upon us like your times. So these things are not going to affect us at
all."
"He
sent me all those videos and pictures when I demanded to see them. Oh, what a
deadly performance was yours, Acha? Lungi folded up, holding the stick and
stone in your hands, I felt ashamed to see my father running to attack the
women." Her father sat downcast, tears welled up in his eyes and rolled
down through cheeks. A shower of remorse falling in front of his daughter for
the atrocities he had committed in the past! The daughter sat on the bed,
holding him close.
"I have
searched the net, it was termed Menstrual Riots, wasn't it? Amma, you are a
science graduate, why couldn't you tell Achan that the monthly period is
a natural phenomenon and that it is not impure? You could have thus prevented
him from becoming a laughing stock before the generations to come."
"But..mole,"
Her mother stopped half way.
"She
had said that mole. But I was too excited to listen to her, it was as if
something gripped me that day ..."
" It
was sheer foolishness that gripped you that day, Acha, " thus saying, the
daughter burst into laughter again.
"While
I was working in Pune, a friend of mine told me once that she doesn't like to
utter her family name before anyone, because hers was the illam which did not
let Gandhiji in. Now I'm also driven into such an embarrassing situation. If
people come to know that the man in that video is my dad...I can't even think
of it. Acha, do you know, the Wikipedia page about the riot has pictures too. The
most prominent is the one with you holding sticks and stones. You thought
you were doing something great for your lord, but actually you were bringing
disgrace to your next generations."
Unable to
contain himself, her father looked down again. "Anyway, let us leave
it Acha. Let those bygones be bygones." The daughter made her mother also
sit there near her, and she sat in between the two of them. At times, the
caring daughter may become a parent too.
Notes:
1.Achan and
Amma- Father and Mother
2. Mole:
Affectionate way of saluting a daughter
3. Manithi-
was the name of a Tamil women's organisation whose members paid a visit to the Sabarimala
temple during 2018, consequent to a
court order of the Apex court of India. They were welcomed with stones and
sticks by a certain group of people at the temple premises. I have used it purposely
as a lady's name here.
3. Menstrual
riot: There was an apex court order in 2018 allowing women between 10 and 50
years to enter the famous hilltop shrine Sabarimala where
Ayyappa is the deity. The order was
met with strong opposition from a certain set of people, mostly belonging to a
political party.
4. Thatwamasi: is a Sanskrit phrase which has been inscribed at the
temple's entry. This word can be translated as " You are that," "It's
you", "I am thou
thyself," "You are me" too.
5. Lungi-a garment similar to a sarong, wrapped around the waist and
extending to the ankles
6. Illam: The
house of Nampoothiri castes in Kerala
Sreelatha S
20.08.2020
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